Ashley's Life at the New Underground Sancturay
by 907dogtrainer
Summary: Part of 'My Underground Sanctuary City saga' VI... The continuing story of life in the underground Sanctuary. This will contain different stories having to do mainly with Ashley.
1. Chapter 1

**How is Ashley's life going? Where is Ashley's life going? Will she ever be normal again? Will she ever trust herself again?**

Ashley has regained 95% of her memories. Jess thought it was better to not try and pull those last painful memories of her kidnapping and her actions under the Cabal. Trying to show faith that Ashley was ready to move to ward 2. She no longer had to wear the bracelets. Also anyone of Ashley's old or new family was welcome to visit her, inside her room.

Will of course disagreed, but didn't push the subject. He want to push Ashley to remember now, she needed to deal with what had happen. But he was sure in time Ashley would deal with all her memories. He was now seeing Ashley once a week, almost always accompanied by Gina.

Will was also not a fan of the games Jess made up, to help Ashley learn to control her powers. They were only working on her Vampire powers. Learning to extend 1 claw only, or claws only on 1 hand. How to use her strength, smell, and hearing without fully transforming. All this was with Nikola's help. Jess had menaced she wanted Ashley to start sparing with Nikola soon. Will didn't like how close Jess and Tesla had gotten either. Anyone who was really buddies with Tesla would have to have their own agenda, as well.

Ashley was glad that Gina was coming with Will. She liked seeing Will, but she knew he was there to do his head shrinking thing. At least with Jess, she was there to hang out. There were times they did nothing but giggle and act goofy. Even though Jess was about 40, she still was a lot of fun, Ashley thought.

The 3 were in Ashley's room playing a game of scrabble. Ashley didn't really like the game. But if it kept Will from psychoanalyzing her, she was all for it.

"Zebra and it's a double word score," Gina boasted. Will shook his head and wrote down her score. "My turn," Ashley said swiveling the board.

-In Nikola's Lab-

Nikola stood at his table working on some small device. He was facing the sofa so he could watch Helen and Jess playing with baby Elizabeth, Lizzie for short. He liked the kid but made it clear he didn't plan to hold the thing until it was house trained and stopped drooling.

"Give me my baby," Helen said as reached over and took Lizzie from Jess. "Your baby," Jess laughed. Jess and Helen loved teasing each other. Nikola loved seeing Helen so carefree. When it was just Helen and Jess, they both seemed to laughed harder, smiled longer and relaxed. In a way that he hadn't seen Helen do since Oxford. He did really like Jess too. Over the short time they had grown close. They even teased each other and were very relaxed as well.

Helen pulled of Lizzie's socks, "I love those baby toes…. I'm going to eat those baby toes!" "Please elaborate, why women love baby toes or chubby baby legs?" Nikola asked only half looking up. Helen and Jess laughed and leaned on each other. "Their toes look like little grapes," Jess said. "You just want to pop them in your mouth," added Helen. Nikola just shook his head, and went back to work.

Jess stood up and took Lizzie from Helen. She held her so Lizzie was facing forward. Walking up to the table swaying Lizzie a little. "What is uncle Nikie working on?" "Uncle Nikie, I've told you don't start that or Heinrich is going to start calling me grandpa." Nikola said as he looked up. He had this face he made at just Lizzie. It was a scrunched up smile but you could see he liked her. Lizzie blinked back a few times. "Why does she do that blinking thing?" Jess looked at her daughter, "I don't know she just started doing it. But I've only seen her do it to you and Ashley."

Nikola motioned for Helen to come over. "Take the bundle of goo." Helen reached and took her goddaughter, "Uncle Nikie real does like you. He's just a bit particular about his suits." Nikola looked down wiping way invisible wrinkles from his vest and shirt. He did like to wear his vest and sometimes a tie.

"Face me," Nikola instructed Jess. He took he arms and raised them out from her sides. He grabbed the device that he had been working on. It was on a black leather belt. He reached around to put it on her. Jess smiled looking down at him, "Hello, hello." "Mommy's going to now show you how to smack a guy when he get fresh," Helen teased as she pointed at Nikola. He ignored both of them. After he buckled the belt, he checked the 2" x 4" box. Slapping Jess' hand, when she tried to touch it. "There now we just need to see how well it works," he said standing straight up again. Jess put her hands down, "What is it?" "It's a wearable version of your telepathic blocker dome." "Really," Helen said moving to take a closer look. "For the gal on the go," Nikola teased. "Well, thank you tooth boy." Jess flashed him a quick smile.

Nikola reached over and pressed the only button. "Feel anything?" "Well, it's not shocking me." "I mean, can you feel any emotions or hear anyone's thoughts?" He walked behind Helen. Jess was reaching out, when Helen jumped. "Don't do that when I'm holding the baby, Blood cheek!" Helen slap Nikola's arm, then rubbed the spot he must have pinched. Jess laughed, "Nope, it's working. Although I hope Lizzie isn't able to pick up the profanity going thought Helen's mind, no doubt." Jess grabbed Nikola and stood toe to toe with him. Placing her hands on his shoulders. It was his turn to say, "Hello, hello." "Interesting, I can feel you but it's muddled." Nikola stepped back, "Just another of Nikola Tesla's great inventions," he bowed.

Jess pushed the button and reached out again. She couldn't help but start to blush. Helen was mad at Nikola and a tiny bit turned on. Jess took the device off. Placing it on the table, then she took Lizzie back giving Helen her naughty girl look.

"Is it finished? I can take it with me?" She was looking up close at it. "Yes, just be gentle with it. I only made the one." "Maybe you should try wearing it around Sally and see what happens. It is water-" Helen's question was cut off. Jess and Helen had their small communicators start flashing red. It meant there was a problem with Ashley. Helen and Jess looked at each other with a little panick. Jess deposited Lizzie in Nikola's arms and was on Helen's heels. As they raced to the 3rd ward.

Nikola looked horrified at the 3 month old baby in his arms. He hadn't even been able to get an objection out. "I really do like this suit, kid. Try not to expel anything on it." He grabbed her little blanket and follow at a walk. He wasn't sure he could run with the baby and not hurt it.

Trevor had summoned Bromley as well, but he hadn't arrived when Helen and Jess ran in. The scene was alarming. Ashley was in full Vampire mode and keeping Will cornered. She had almost a death grip on Gina's wrist. But she was holding her behind and to the side. There was no way of physically controlling her, without the bracelets. That didn't stop Jess. Dealing with wild or injured animals was in her blood.

Jess took in the scene and reacted. Even as Helen told her not to go in there. Jess push the door open and looked at Gina. "What the Hell is going on!?" Ashley turned her head to look at Jess, hissing and clawing with her free hand at Will. "I don't know what happened." Gina was on the verge of tears. She struggled to get free of Ashley's grip.

Jess side stepped, so she was in front of Ashley but well out of her current reach. "Honey Bunny, what's up?" Ashley, shook her head and growled. Jess could see Will was holding he right forearm. "How's it going Will?" "A little help, she's gone nuts!" Jess looked back to Ashley, "I know Will can be a pain, but that's no reason to slice and dice him." "Where is Bromley," Will yelled so they could hear him out the door. Helen stood in the door way, "He's coming Will."

Ashley was now getting more agitated, she was now facing down 3 people. Will in the corner, Jess in front of her and Mom at the door. But she stayed many focused on Will. "Ashley, let Gina go," Helen called out. Seeing how tight her grip was. Jess quickly formed a plan, "Are you hurting your sister?" Ashley looked at Gina with concern, "Sorry." She let go and Gina rubbed her wrist. Jess didn't need to use her telepathic powers, she gave Gina a look that said be ready. Gina nodded and said, "Thank you for letting me go, Ashley." Ashley looked at her sister and that's when Jess closed the distanced. Jess grabbed Ashley's right hand and her throat, pushing her against the wall. Gina used both hands and grab Ashley's left hand.

Jess was well aware if Ashley wanted to hurt them it wouldn't be hard. But the emotion coming from Ashley was different and confusing today. "WILL, OUT!" Jess commanded, Helen grabbed Will as he rushed for the door.

"Talk to me Ashley… Use your words Bunny." Gina saw Jess' eyes were closed and her knuckles were going white. As she was squeezing Ashley's throat with each request. "Let me in Bunny… I'm not going to hurt you." Helen saw Will's wound was only a glancing blow. Just as Bromley entered Helen motioned for him to wait a second. Will commented that Ashley was unstable and Bromley needed to get in there before Gina or Jess got themselves hurt.

-inside Ashley's Mind-

Jess was pounding on a large wooden door. Begging Ashley to let her in. Ashley called out, "No, go away." "I'm not leaving, you know I'll stay here til I pass out!" "Is Gina safe?" "Yes, I don't think you hurt her." Ashley started to open the door.

-back in the room-

Gina could see Jess' legs were being to shake. Both Jess and Ashley looked like they were in pain. But Ashley's claw started to retract.

\- inside Ashley's Mind -

"I wouldn't hurt her. But he tried to." Ashley cracked the door open.

"Who Bunny? Who was hurting your sister?"

An image of Will appeared. Ashley tried to slam the door, but Jess stuck her foot in it and forcing it to stay open.

"Bunny, let me in." Jess begged, as she held the door open but wouldn't cross the threshold.

"No, he said things! He's probably right!"

"Who knows you? Me, I know you. I brought my Elizabeth to see you. I trusted you with my little baby."

"You did," Ashley opened the door, slide to her knees crying in the doorway.

"You are a good girl and you protect everyone, and I protect you." Jess slide to the floor with her and kissed her forehead.

"Rest Bunny, We'll fix this together. Like we always do."

-back in the room-

Ashley and Jess had slide to their knees. Jess opened her eyes as she kissed Ashley forehead. Ashley was human again. Gina and Jess put Ashley in bed and exited the room. Jess was visibly shaking.

Will was standing next to Helen and Bromley. "Hold on, what the Hell was that?" Jess' adrenaline was still going and she made a bee line for Will. As Gina pulled the door closed. Jess hear Helen ask something but march up to Will. With a wicked right cross she knocked Will on his butt. "Don't you ever do that again!" It was all she got out before everything went black.

Everyone held their breath as Will went down. But Gina and Bromley anticipated that Jess would faint. Bromley scooped her up before she could hit the ground. Trevor decided someone should help Will up. Helen, Gina and Bromley (who was carrying Jess) were already on their way to the infirmary.

Finally Justin came over to clean and dress Will's arm. It didn't even need stitches. Everyone else was fussing over Jessica. Jess came to and at first couldn't remember what had happen. Gina walked everyone through what had happen from the start. "Then you knock Will on his ass!" Jess looked out the window to Will who was over doing it with the ice pack. "I hit him?" "He went down like a sack of potatoes."

"Ashley- I mean Gina, that enough." Helen said shaking her head for using the wrong daughter name.

Jess was trying to replay in her head what had happened. "I kind of bent Rule number 1. Sally is not going to be too happy with me. I need to go see Ash." Jess tried to get up. "When are you going to learn? You always say that and I always say no!" Helen said pushing her back down. Jess took Helen hand and moved it, "Guess what this time, I AM going to go see her!" Helen had never seen that look, or maybe she did but only once. Helen followed her but didn't say a word. They just got in the lift when Jess grabbed Helen's wrist, "Oh my lord, where is Elizabeth?" "Nikola and Greg are looking after her."

Ashley was tried but alright. Lang had given her another meal and she was doing fine. No damage from what Jess felt was to forceful of her. Ashley said she felt find and didn't think Jess had done anything wrong. Jess said they would talk more later after they had both rested. After Jess had time to review any video of what happened. And after she sorted out the emotions she had felt coming off of Ashley.

**Epilog:**

**What set Ashley off?**

"So Ash, are you feeling ready to move out of here yet?" Will asked as he swiveled the board for his turn.

"Well, Jess and I have talked about that being a goal. I'm just not ready yet."

"You can't hide in here forever." Will said with a flat voice. He wasn't trying to be mean as he laid out the letters for his word.

Gina got mad, "What do you mean hide? She recovering and relearning her own body!"

" I mean she's not dealing with the fact that she's more dangerous than Tesla, now." Will's voice got a little firmer.

"She not dangerous! She got more game now, and when she's mastered how to use it. No one will ever mess with her again!"

Ashley tried to say something but it was as if they forgot she was in the room.

"You didn't see what she's capable of. Druitt and Tesla couldn't stop her or any of the others!" Will pushed back his chair so he was facing Gina.

Gina might look like the nice girl next door, but she was a Magnus. And raised by a Rolling Thunder. "Will, I think you're done for the day. Get out!"

At that point Gina stood up and pointed to the door. Ashley stood as well, feeling very shaky.

Will stood up doing his typical hand gestures, "Hate to tell you this, but you're not in charge here. I'm actually trained to do this. I'm glad Jess and you got the ball rolling. But now I think it's time you face the facts, you're out of your league."

Everything slowed down for Ashley. She could hear their hearts pounding. Could see and hear Will clenching his jaw. As he stepped into Gina's personal space. She saw Gina's hands clench into a fist, and then relax after letting out a breath. Something was happening to Ashley, something that had never happened before. The feeling was new, her blood was raising. Gina needed to move, needed to be safe.

"STOP!" Ashley shouted almost at the top of her lungs.

Before either Will or Gina knew it, Ashley had Vamped out. Flipped the table, grabbed Gina and clawed at Will. She wasn't sure what to do. Part of her what to ripe Will into pieces, but Gina was begging Ashley to relax. How could she relax, after what Will said. She knew if she hurt him, it would only prove his point. Maybe she needed to move, but maybe instead of ward 2. Maybe she need to be in the Shu.


	2. Chapter 2

**Sanctuary Life needs to get back to normal, or at least a new normal. Declan has been waiting for the go ahead, on the new teams. But Helen is dragging her feet.**

Abby and Jess were sitting in the conference room. The table was a lima bean shape. It could sit 8 comfortably with a few stools against the wall. No doubt for any large abnormals that might need to sit in on a conference. There was a fake window that mirrored the outside, on one wall. On the other there where five view screen for viewing charts or video calls.

Abby set a cup of tea down for Jess and coffee for herself. "Sorry, no milk." "That's ok, now that I'm not pregnant. I plan to enjoy something other then tea all the time. But it's too early in the day to start, that." She said with a wink, Abby laughed. Jess took a sip, "Do you know why we're here? Helen only said it had to do with Ashley and Nikola." Abby looked funny at her while blowing on her coffee. "She told me it had to do with some training at City 2."

Both women were confused, Abby asked. "You don't think Magnus wants to move Ashley to City 2?" Jess put her cup down a little hard, "She better not be thinking that. My little girl isn't going anywhere but ward 2." Just then Helen walked in. "Your little girl?" Jess shot Helen her innocent face, "Well, she's kinda, my girl." The corner of Helen's mouth went up. As she got herself a cup of tea. "That she is. And just incase you need reassuring. I have Ashley schedule to move to ward 2, tomorrow. So be ready to walk her there. It will make her fell better, if you take her." Abby gave Jess a shoulder bump and smile.

"So Magnus, what's going on? What type of training involves Ashley and Tesla?" Abby asked. "Ahh, well-" The voices of Will and Declan were heard as they entered the room. "Very well, now we are ready to begin." Helen continued as Declan sat next to Jess and Will on the other side of Declan.

Jess smiled coyly at Declan, "No one told me you were coming?" Helen didn't bother looking up from the folder she was sorting through. "No, I only told Will last night, why?" Declan swallowed, did Jess know about a certain friend Declan had in city 1. Jess couldn't help but give Declan's leg a pat under the table. He eyed her, knowing what she was up to. Touching him so she could get a reading. "I hope to stay a day or 2. Just to have a look around and visit old friends." Abby could see something was going on but turned her attention back to Magnus.

Helen and Declan explained that, after everyone was safely underground. After 6 months they had planned to contact the 3 remain Sanctuaries above and see how things were. If they were able to function as before or if they need retrieval teams or help with any sensors. As it turned out, some of the smaller safe houses had been raided by SCIU and the Sanctuaries left had difficulty leaving their countries. Let alone their continent. Which meant any sea sensors could not be checked out at all.

Helen was glad she had found and hidden Berth/Kali in a very safe place. With a decoy in place to throw off SCIU if they got to close.

Helen explained that Declan was going to start training 3 teams of 5, with a few back ups. For going to the surface, for water and other sensor checks. Kate and Garris would be kept in the loop if any more Praxis abnormals wanted to come home.

"What has this got to do with Nikola and Ashley? I mean Nikola could be on a team. But no way is Ashley close to being ready to leave the underground." Jess piped up. Declan placed his hand on top of hers, "No mate, I don't want either of them on a team. But after I do basic training at City 2. I want to bring the teams here to train against Tesla and Ashley." Jess wasn't sure about that either.

Helen spoke up, "Listen, Declan is ex-SAS and will be leading the training. I was hoping Abby, you might want to go and assist him. Jess, If Ashley isn't ready that's find. We'll just use Nikola and any others who might want to help, in the training." Abby got excited, "Really?" Will leaning forward, "Now will this include Sally? You said something about water sensors. Are you planning to have them come here and practice diving?"

"As City 1 has the most water abnormals, and therefore the most water. Yes, I plan to have the teams practice diving in the different water types. But whether Sally want to help out, will be up to her." Helen looked at Jess who was studying her cup of tea. "Jessica, your thoughts?" Jess was taking in all the emotions in the room. She looked up, "Declan doing the training and Abby helping is a good plan. Having them come her for finale training is a logical idea too. But what time frame are we looking at for Declan's boot camp?"

Declan smiled at her, "Well, first we need to put out word for anyone that wants to try out for the teams. Then I think 9 weeks at City 2. Then give them a break for 2 weeks, let anyone back out. If they think it's too much for them. Then we finish here with another 3 to 4 weeks."

Everyone agreed it was a good plan, and with the telepaths at City 2. They could check the mental stability of the recruits. "Since we are all agreed. Declan when you get back to City 2. Go ahead and put out a notice for your recruits and start the process." Everyone started to get up, "Jessica, could you stay for a minute." It was the 2nd time she had called her Jessica. That meant something was defiantly up.

Before Declan could leave Jess smiled and grabbed his arm. "After I'm done here, I have to go and pick up Elizabeth from Willow." Declan nodded and followed Will and Abby out. By the way Will told Abby, "We need to talk about this." Declan wanted to stay clear of them.

After the door closed Helen sat down across from Jess. "Well, you were unusually quite." "H, this is Sanctuary business. I'm just-" "Stop right there. If you say you just a farm girl, one more time. I will hit you! You're my friend, confidant and all round sweet heart of City 1." Jess shook her head but was smiling knowing to she was right. Not everyone loved her, but many did. "Declan has been pushing this for a month now. I've been putting it off, until after Christmas. But he's right, I said 6 months and it's been longer. I just worry about everything that might be waiting up there!" "You mean, now that you're not everyone's sweetheart." Helen let out a sad laugh, "Yes, something like that. I want, need you to tell me I'm just being silly. I'm Helen Magnus, I don't get intimidated." Jess could sense her real fear, "Your afraid anyone you send up there will be a target. You don't want to lose anyone or worse." Jess reached across the table palm up. Helen slide her hand into Jess'. "This is a volunteer program. You are not sending anyone on a Kamikaze run. They will check things out and go do what you've been doing for over 200 yrs." Helen let out a breath, she didn't even realize she was holding in. "Well done Jess. Always able to tell me what I already know. And make me feel better." Helen let go of Jess' hand. She stood up and gathered her papers, "But if you let on about my self doubt." Jess smiled as she pushed in her chair. "H, have I ever. After all, you might shot me if I did. You already shot my man once." "Once and it only grazed him," Helen made a move like she would hit Jess. Jess laughed as she skedaddle out of the room.

The next day

Ashley was almost sad to leave the ward 3. She had a few good friends there now and she would miss the floorwalkers. But when everyone kept pushing her to move, Jess had started to shut up. If Ashley asked her if she was truly ready. Jess would just make a zipper motion across her lips.

So Ashley knew, it was time to asked to see her mom privately. Ashley was ready to move to ward 2, with a few conditions.

1\. She wanted a room near the front of the ward.

2\. She wanted to wear her bracelets at least for the first month.

3\. She wanted some kind of a job. Something to keep her busy.

Helen agreed to all of them. The twins and Henry moved the thing she wanted to take. When she was ready Ashley asked both Jess and Nikola to walk her to the new ward. Of course Jess to the long way, which meant they had to talk through the rotunda. Nikola knew they were going the wrong way, but said nothing.

Ashley was super nervous walking around all the abnormals. More then a few were whispering about her. As Jess was friends with many of them, and most of them knew what had happen to the Big Guy. Those that knew what the Ashley gang had done, were a little more understanding. Jess held Ashley's hand the whole time. When they got to ward 2, Ashley just wanted to get to her room and hide.

Gina stayed with Ashley for a few hours after everyone else left. Then Greg came before Gina left. He told her he would only stay until bedtime. Henry and Will would come in the morning. But she would have to be along overnight. After all she was a big girl.

Ashley had a feeling Jess hadn't walked her straight to her new ward. But she told herself the new place was super cool and she was glad she saw some of it. She was also glad that she and Gina decide, they would hang out for the first 2 or 3 hours. She didn't want to be left on her own just yet. Even though she did know some of the residents in the ward like Two Face, Albert and Dusty Erin.

Ashley room was the size of a dorm room. Nothing fancy and different then, what everyone else had. With the exception of a small computer that allowed her to contact anyone at any time.

She could take her meals in her room or in one of the common areas. When more than 2 people came to visit they would have to use a common area. Her new room was just too small to fit any more in it. This would be a big adjustment for Ashley, but since coming back from the dead. She felt up to the challenge as long as she was still wearing her bracelets for safety.

Declan had asked Jess, if it would be ok to talk to Ashley. And if it wasn't to much trouble would she come with. Jess agreed, after all Chris wasn't needed today, so he could watch Elizabeth.

-After lunch-Ashley's first full day in ward 2-

Declan and Jess entered the second ward, 3 or 4 abnomals came up to say hi to Declan including 2 face. Jess was happy to find Ashley out in the sunroom. She was standing looking outside with her arms crossed in front of her. The sunroom was an area that was almost all some kind of glass. So the residents could look out and see the part of the walking garden. "Hey Bunny, I'm glad to see you out here." Ashley turned to see Jess and Declan. Will said Declan would probably come to see her, about something. Will tried to make it sound like it was something to be scared of.

"Jess, Declan, good to see you." She said turning but not greeting Jess with a hug like she normally did. Jess walked over and gave Ashley a reassuring back rub. "Doing ok, so far?" Ashley walked over to a set of 4 chairs, and sat down. "I guess, it's new, but it's nice to see old faces." She played with her bracelets. "Ash, I'm so glad you're doing so well. For a while no one was sure you'd come back to us." Declan looked at Jess as if to ask was that ok. Jess gave him a half smile, "Ashley's a Magnus, they're tougher then they look." Ashely managed a smile. "Ashley, Declan has something he wants to run past you. You don't have to answer now, it's just something to chew on. You said you wanted a task or 2. To keep busy with."

Declan laid out the plan for the teams and what he was hoping for. He explained if she didn't feel up to it. No one would think less of her. He thought it would take weeks before he would even start training. Ashley wasn't sure how she felt. Once again Will had gotten in her head. Making her feel she was a lose cannon and needed to be kept on a short leash.

"Do you think I can do it? Without hurting someone I mean?" Ashley asks Jess. "At best this wouldn't start for what, 3 months or more." She looked in Declan's direction, "You and Nikola have only spared twice. And we've only begun to work on your teleporting. I think in maybe 2 months we could revisit this and she how you're feeling." Declan nodded, "Ash, that sounds alright to you Love?" Ashley smiled (a real smile that showed in her eyes) for the first time at Declan, "Yes, right now just moving here took a long time to work up to. Maybe having time to think about this training, I might be ok. By the time you need me. At least Nikola will have fun teasing and trying to outwit your trainees."

**I love to hear if you think Ashley will train with new teams? Or would you like to see her join a team? And how well will she be able to control her powers?**


	3. Chapter 3

**This is my first attempt at writing a whole story from 1 persons point of view, or their inner monologue.**

POV Ashley

I wake at 6 am. I don't know why I even bother to set an alarm these days. Since becoming a super vampire I normal only sleep for a few hours. I think I set the alarm because I never was a morning person. And even though I'm awake, I'm still not a morning person. I read or crosswords in my room or the sunroom. I like it when it's quite. The day slowly starts, to the sounds of ocean and birds. Every month they change to sound that comes over the intercom in Ward 2. So the residents can slowly wake to the sounds of nature. I have a small glass of my breakfast.

Today is sparing with Nikola, for the 5th time and lesson #1 on teleporting. I'm scared, big time! What if I teleport somewhere out of the city. Nikola said when my dad first got his powers. He and James Watson helped him figure them out. Guess I should go easy on Nikola this time. Last time we spared I kinda on purpose hit him hard. I know Jess knew by the look she gave me. That I did it on purpose, but she didn't rat me out.

It's hard for me to think about my life now. I feel like my life is in limbo. I'm not who I was. But I don't know what the future holds. I know a lot of time has passed from the time Henry and I went to the Cabal and now. But it also feels like it just happened. I also know that I would be a prize for any Cabal like place to capture. Which makes me think I don't ever want to leave this place.

Jess knocks on my open door.

"Ya Jess, I'm ready to go."

"Yes, I slept ok."

I rarely get nightmares anymore or at least that's what I tell her. I don't know if she believes me. Having a telepathic friend/aunt is sometimes a pain, but in a good way. She knows me better then I know myself.

We walk outside into a part of the grounds that is used for wrestling or sparing. Nikola is already there waiting for us. He's funny, he has a special set of clothes he wears for sparing. They are a thin dark top and tan slacks. The slacks are a thick durable fabric. He can stand the idea of wearing sweatpants or active wear. I hate to admit it, but he's starting to grow on me.

We start with just like normal, just him throwing punches and me dodging them or blocking them. Then we work on him using his claws and speed. But still I'm only to dodge them or block them. I know it's to help control the rage I feel when attacked. I feel my blood start to boil and I want to take his head off. Jess seems to know when I'm about to loss it. She lets him push me until I want my claws to come out. That when we take a 5 minute calming break.

I'm still wound up but that's part of it. To control the rage I sometimes feel. I've killed things before, but I was always in control. When I get really enraged, I feel lost. Like I'm watching my body do things and I can't stop it. That's why we train like this.

We move on to Nikola and I are in full Vampire mode. Now it's my turn to punch and claw. While Nikola has to dodge or block my moves. But today Jess wants me to pretend I'm sparing Declan or my brother Greg. To only use the force needed to stop a human. It's tough as hell to do! But I understand that I'm so strong now, I could kill a human by hitting them just right. I connect with Nikola's left leg, when I try to sweep it. He flips in the air. He's ok but I see Jess' face. She makes sure Nikola's alright and we go again, for another 10 minutes and then stop. She asks me if I'm tired. Nikola seems pleased I'm doing better.

"No, I'm fine Jess. Sure I'll have some water."

"Thank Nikola, I'm glad you think I'm doing better."

"Yes Jess, I know you are proud of how well I'm doing, too. I just meant Nikola can feel it in how I fight. In how much strength I put into a punch or kick."

"Scared to teleport? Are you kidding? I'm so ready, let's get it on."

I try to act tough about teleporting but Jess knows. How she can see or feel the change in me is sometimes crazy. But I do feel safer around her. Safer from the part of me I'm still learning to control.

Jess takes a rope and make a large circle and puts her collapsible chair in it. It's 15 feet away, and Nikola tells me to try and teleport into the circle. Here goes nothing. I don't make it for the first 8 tries. I'm all over the place. Sometimes 15 feet in the other directions. Then I make it, but I'm lying on the ground. How is that even possible? Nikola is very encouraging, even making me laugh at the whole thing. 'Saying if I was a teenage boy trying to get into the girls locker room. I'd be more motivated.' I think he's spending too much time with Jess.

They make me do it 6 more times then we stop. I'm tired and really hungry. Nikola says that's normal. After a lot of activity he gets hungry. We walk back inside. Jess is disappointed that I have her put my bracelets back on. I don't wear them in Ward 2 anymore. But I still feel safer when I leave the ward, knowing if something happened. There is a way to help stop me.

Jess and Nikola don't walk me to my ward today. We go to the living Unit. It's the first time I've been there. Nikola shares some of his food. While Jess settles for some stew and fresh bread. No one is in home except Greg, who is a sleep. I listen to hear his heart beat and his breathing.

"What? Nothing, I was just listening to the noises in the Unit. Can I see the doves?"

I hated the pigeons that were always on the Sanctuary roof. Now I find I miss the noise of their wings. Or just the noise of the city. After lunch Nikola needs to shower and get some other work done for mom. Jess and I stroll back to the ward. We pass Bromley and we hug, I miss the big lug. I see Willow hold Lizzie and I take her. Her Jaguar form is beautiful and her fur is like velvet. Willow seems nice, I've never seen her in human form. I'm told she's hotter then mom, and my mom's hot.

Lizzie loves scrunching her face at me or Nikola. She knows we can make are face change, and she thinks it's funny. Probably the only kid on earth who laughs at a vampire, but I love it and her! If Jess stays here and Lizzie grows up like I did, with all the abnormals. She's going to be absolute fearless.

We walk into Ward 2. Most of the residents love when Lizzie comes. Two Face is there and both of them say hi to her. She laughs and tries to look at them both at the same time. There is another resident that almost never speaks, to anyone. He's French and does speak any English except yes and no. Lizzie waves and he slowly walks over. His name is Hone and he wears gloves. His body is elemental and can get very cold. He does good at controlling it. But controlling his hands is the hardest part. He smiles and says 'Hello' in French. Lizzie blows him a kiss and you can see it truly warms him.

Jess and Lizzie visit for a few minutes, but I can see she's tired. She's having another baby and it takes a lot out of her. Sometimes I wonder how she was able to help me when she was pregnant with Lizzie.

I play online video games with other residents. My favorite is Civilaztion! I'm playing with 2 beings in Ward 4 and 1 in Ward 3. Even some in the SHU are allowed access to games. It makes us all feel more connected.

Mom calls me from her office everyday about 4. If she doesn't then I call her. I remind her to finish working if she's in her office. She needs to go home eat, relax and hangout.

"Yes mom. Yes. I know. Ok. I love you too."

I remind her that she should start thinking about letting Will take over her spot as Head of House. That would give her more time to just be Head of the Network. After all what has she been training Will for all these year for. She needs to let go and leave more time for friend, family, her studies and a maybe few hobbies maybe.

It's bedtime, Greg just left. He doesn't come every night like he used to. But he still comes about every other night, even if it's just for 10 minutes. I love Greg and Gina! I'm so glad mom had them. I'm also glad I'm still the oldest. I like thinking of how I would have bossed them around. If we had all been raised together.

I pull the covers over my shoulder as I lay on my side. What does the future hold for me? Will I ever feel confidante in my own skin again? Will I ever go out on missions again? Shoot will I ever ride a bike again? Go to sleep, I tell myself. Tomorrow is another day, lets see what it brings.

**Hope you liked this chapter**


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